Cannot make this stuff up.

this miracle ointment on TV, "Blue Star Ointment". They advertised for instant relief of insect itching, poison ivy, and most importantly tick bites. It was $5 a tub. We got some as we lived in the country and could use it. They lied! Well technically I guess the claims held some truth. The itching was initially replaced with a soothing cool feeling. Then it slowly transitioned to a heated feeling that really escalated. I found the greasy ointment really difficult to wash off and the effects impressively lasting. You sure did forget about the itching!